When You Need Faith Like a Child....

(And this time I don't have an answer. But don't think that I haven't tried, I still have the heart of a seeker. But I need the faith of a child, I need the faith of a child. O.C. Supertones)

So for those of you who don't know this I was once a Biblical Studies Major in college
At least that is what my major was for awhile before I ended up switching to Ministry.  Now the reason I have always told people for the switch from Bib Studies to Christian Min was because I would be able to graduate earlier, because I wouldn't have had to take 3 semesters of Greek.  And this is all very true, even if it still took me 5 years to get done with my undergrad, but that is just not the whole story.  Because if I had really wanted to be a Bib Studies major I would have gladly stayed in school a little longer because I would have been doing something I wanted to do.  But I just didn't love it.  I thought when I started school I would love studying the Bible none stop and digging deeper and deeper in to the words that I was reading.  I mean I love the Bible why would I love studying it?

Now there are a few things that turned me away from Biblical Studies, 
And a few that in time turned me away from Christian Ministry and almost to the point of leaving the Church all together. These things are things I still struggle with today and I consider myself pretty darn sold out to following my amazing savoir Jesus.  So what are these things you ask? 

First, and I would say most painfully, the Christian bubble
If you have ever gone to a Christian school there is a chance you know what I am talking about.  This bubble is the bubble that acts like everyone should be a Republican who is Anti-Abortion but yet pro-war (Someone please tell me how that works?).  This bubble sits around and talks about how "His Theology is so off base."  Or talks about everything in Christian jargon.  And the worst of all of the things that happen in this bubble is the why Christian people talk about non-Christians in judgmental tones and at like the world should live like they do.  If you still can't understand what I am talking about than you are most likely living in a Christian bubble.

Second is the fact that when you study something to much you often lose the joy
This might not be true for everyone but for me when I start to spend to much time breaking something down it just becomes so robotic, so normal, so dead.  When I spend to much time breaking it about I lose the joy of just enjoying it.  Think about it like this I love Basketball, it is by far my favorite sport, but I love watching it with other people so much more because they still see it with childish eyes.  At this point I have coached Basketball for a few years and have played it long before that and been watching it for years so now when I was Basketball by myself I spend all my time breaking down the Offensive systems and analyzing every little part of the game.  Because of this the game has lost a lot of the joy.  I now longer view it as something exciting I just view it as something to study and break down.  Now I often saw this happen when I was a Biblical studies major.  I would study the Bible all the time to the point where the last thing on my mind was to spend a little free time reading and praying.  I mean I was studying it all the time anyways so why did I need to spend more time with it?

Third arrogant views of the scripture
I often felt myself, and often saw people around me, become arrogant about views of the scripture.  Acting like we knew everything about the scripture because we knew how to study.  But this was just never true.  The scriptures are God's creation and from everything I see else where in God's creation the story just keeps on unfolding and the beauty just keeps on getting more beautiful.  So what right do we have to act like we know all the answers? 

I guess I would rather have faith like a child
I would rather feel like I enjoyed my relationship with Christ than feeling like he is just a science project.  But he had become just that to me.  He had become something I could quantify.  I could study him like I would study a math problem or a frog. But this just isn't the way I find God.  To me God is not a science project he is someone I want to get to know not something I want to study.  I so want to have faith like a child.  I want to be able to learn about God and his word not take the relationship out of it and study God like he is not a person but rather a frog to be dissected.  I want to want to run to God when I fall and cut my knee.  I want to be able to have him tuck me in to my bed at night and wake me up in the morning but simply saying "Wake up, Adam".  I want to see God as my father who I love.  I want know that God will be there when I come home no matter how far away I run.  And I want to know above all that he loves me and always will.
 I want faith like a child to carry me to my saviors side where he tells me "I love you my Son."


Do you struggle with having joy about following God?  Do you feel like you have the faith of a child still left in you?


{This will be the start of an going set of posts about my Journey's from College to today and how my faith has been shaped by these times of great doubt, joy, happiness, pain and faith.  I hope you will enjoy walking down the road of finding my faith in God that I now enjoy today.  The Journey is often the Destination so here is my Journey.}